Monday, May 23, 2005

Ineptio

Stupid stupid stupid.

I don't know why I thought as I did, or why I did what I did, but I did do it. In my impetousness and foolishness, I did not think of the consequences, did not think about how the other party would feel, but merely barged ahead with what I had to say.

Perhaps that single mindedness ought to have given me sufficient warning that something was amiss. Such focus and determinationcould mean that I had received a real calling from God. But when you consider what it was I wanted to say, it would have been obvious to the most dull-witted person around that it was not God-breathed, and this meant that it was birthed of the foul deceiver.

And the wonderful result of my idiocy was that I managed to hurt someone I held dear to me. One of the people I know I can depend on, one whom I know I can confide in, and in my selfish short-sightedness, I took away the support I should have given, and struck her.

How is it that I could have allowed such a lapse in my guard, to allow the insidiousness of the evil one to infiltrate so easily, and even then, how could I have allowed myself to become a tool in his cursed hands, and give my beloved sister reason to grieve?

Stupid stupid stupid

1 comment:

Aggie said...

I'm sure she forgives u. =) and loves u still the same.